One of the hardest parts of being in a relationship might just be figuring out how to end it—because let's be real, not all relationships are meant to last.
New Yorkers—we have no chill, but at the same time embody all that is cool—Jay-Z said it best "like Che Guevara with bling on" we're complex.
In cities densely populated like our beloved New York City, it's hard to do anything in private. Everyday people groom themselves and eat seven-course meals while riding the subway, why should your relationship be any different. If you can make out on a park bench, you can break up in public.
So you're ready to end it. Where do you break it off? Now, I don't condone public dumping per se, but if I did, this is how (and where) I would do it.
2 City Island Ave, Bronx, NY
It's busy, like very, very busy; you might be thinking this is not a public dumping attribute—it is, no one wants to cause a scene. No-fuss, no muss. Plus, who can get mad while drinking a cold beer (from a plastic cup) while eating a basket full of fresh fried seafood. The scene is set with views of the Long Island Sound and the Throggs Neck Bridge. What's better than that? Nothing! It's perfect. Suitable for a first date, great for the last date. The only hiccup here is the lack of public transportation. But there's a fix, either come separately or think ahead and order yourself a car at least 10 minutes before breaking it off. You don't want to linger after this one.
6031 Broadway, Bronx, NY
This is a special one, it's not super public, and it's not cheap—but this is an excellent way to end a more significant relationship. A last hoorah if you will. Linen tablecloths and delicious steakhouse fare (try the Bacon Salad, yum!). Enjoy one final night together, and reminisce about the good old days. Ask for the check, pay the bill (you owe your non-significant other that much) and run, don't walk out the door.
Dancing Crane Cafeteria at The Bronx Zoo
2300 Southern Blvd, Bronx, NY
I love everything about this breakup scenario; it's riddled with delicious irony. Spend the day (okay, like an hour) walking around the magnificent zoo grounds. Take in views of the exotic animals held in captivity, all the while relishing in the fact that in a matter of hours, you'll be free. Top of the day with a trip to the cafeteria—the beautiful symphony of children crying and throwing tantrums will mask the fit occurring opposite you. This is a breakup fit for the drama queen/king in your life.
Royal Coach Diner
3260 Boston Rd, Bronx, NY
A diner? Yes, a diner. Open 24 hours a day, seven days a week, Royal Coach has a booth waiting for you anytime the mood strikes. The food is way better than your average diner. Honestly, like way, way better, so it's not an insult to bring someone here at all, regardless of your current relationship status. Plus, breakfast for dinner can ease even the heaviest of hearts. Give me a short stack STAT.
Mon Amour Coffee & Wine
234 W 238th St, Bronx, NY
The morning after breakup, arguably the worst way to break up with someone. You wake up full of regret and just can't go another day being tied down, so you walk together to your local coffee shop. This one is all about the execution; it must be done at a classy joint to take away a bit of the sleaze you're about to sling at your not-so-loved one. Mon Amour is perfect—it's all about the ambiance, brick walls, Parisian flair, AMAZING pastries, and great coffee. Though, I'd direct your other half towards one of their delicious iced beverages; it'll hurt less (you also might want to change your number).
In an age when most relationships play out via social media, it's come to a point where public breakups are almost expected. So, there you have it, five very different locations for all your dumping needs.
Have you ever dumped someone in public, or been dumped? Tell us where!